Favorite Quotes #9 - Hockey Humor

I went to a fight the other night and a hockey game broke out.

Shane Doan and Dustin Brown

--Rodney Dangerfield

I used to dislike hockey because of all the fighting. I thought it was unnecessary. I thought the refs were idiots for letting it go on. Now, I'm coming to understand why it's a necessary part of the game. 


Obviously, hockey players have to be tough, which is why they make such wonderful romance novel heroes. We might marry accountants and lawyers and such, but we fantasize about big warriors, which is sort of all a hockey player is. 


Pictured is the captain of "my" team, the LA Kings, Dustin Brown. He's got the most adorable kids. His wife must be pretty. 


I hate her.


LOL. 

Favorite Quotes #8 - Aliens Among Us

“People say, 'I'm going to sleep now,' as if it were nothing. But it's really a bizarre activity. 'For the next several hours, while the sun is gone, I'm going to become unconscious, temporarily losing command over everything I know and understand. When the sun returns, I will resume my life.'

If you didn't know what sleep was, and you had only seen it in a science fiction movie, you would think it was weird and tell all your friends about the movie you'd seen.

They had these people, you know? And they would walk around all day and be OK? And then, once a day, usually after dark, they would lie down on these special platforms and become unconscious. They would stop functioning almost completely, except deep in their minds they would have adventures and experiences that were completely impossible in real life. As they lay there, completely vulnerable to their enemies, their only movements were to occasionally shift from one position to another; or, if one of the 'mind adventures' got too real, they would sit up and scream and be glad they weren't unconscious anymore. Then they would drink a lot of coffee.'

So, next time you see someone sleeping, make believe you're in a science fiction movie. And whisper, 'The creature is regenerating itself.”
 
― George Carlin, Brain Droppings

Love It Wednesday #7 - Lime!

I love Key Lime Pie, so when Starbucks came out with their Refreshers last summer, I was in heaven.

But then the drinks went away after summer was over. I was sad.

Now they're back!! Forever! The refreshers sold so well that the powers that be decided to make them a core drink. The Berry Hibiscus Refresher is yummy, but can't compare to the Cool Lime, at least for me. If you put a teeny bit of vanilla syrup in it, it's like Key Lime Pie in a cup.

Here are some facts about the refreshers that I spouted about eighty zillion times yesterday when I had to give out samples for four hours. Refreshers:

--are made with green coffee extract
--have a little more caffeine than a Coke (40-60 milligrams)
--are made with real fruit (blackberries and limes) and real fruit juice
--contain 50-70 calories in a grande

If you'd like to try one, go to a participating Starbucks this Friday between noon and three. They're giving away free tall Refreshers, one per customer. :)

Re-boot

So, I got this great idea for the hockey book, tentatively titled CHARMED.

Unfortunately, it necessitated a rewrite of the beginning. LOL. I laugh because this is my M.O. I start and restart and restart my books. Such is the life of a writer who plots as she goes. Here's the new opening...

The San Diego Barracudas reload with Locke, Stoccetti and Barringer, but will they be shooting blanks this season? Marc Stoccetti left the Oilers under a cloud, but Coach Marchand thinks the seasoned center still has some pow left in him. Personally, I’m not sure. All three of these guys are on the far side of their prime, but Lord knows the Barracudas are a young team in need of strong, experienced leadership. 

--Breakaway Baby, a hockey blog

“How old were you when you lost your virginity?”

Marco Stocchetti was jogging on the treadmill with his two good friends in the Barracuda's workout room. Christian Barringer had asked the question.

“I was ten,” Marc said.

Simon Locke, captain of the team, laughed. “The fuck you were.”

Marc chuckled. “All right. I was sixteen.”

Barringer nodded. “Hey, I was sixteen, too. Marissa Clairmont.” He sighed. “What sweet fucking pussy she had. I swear to God it tasted like peach pie.”

“I lost my cherry to Alison Chase,” Marc said. “In the back of her car.”

“Oh yeah? What did she taste like?” Barringer asked.

Marc shrugged. “I never went down on her,” he admitted. “But her mouth always tasted like Big Red gum.”

Barringer nodded as he adjusted the speed on his machine. “There was an old lady on my street when I was a kid who gave out Big Red on Halloween. You’d knock on her door and she’d give you one stick. That pissed me off so bad. I used to think she was cheap, but now I realize she was probably just on a fixed income.” Barringer sighed. “Maybe I should look her up. See if she needs some money.”

Locke cleared his throat. “If you two are done with your stroll down memory lane, I’d like to get back to the matter at hand. You can’t have the number sixteen,” he said to Marc. “That’s Carpenter’s number.”

“Shit.” 

Favorite Quotes #7 - Ouch!

As you know, I'm writing a hockey romance. I thought it appropriate to post a hockey player quote. This one made me hoot.

"I'm just glad it wasn't machete night."

—Bob Froese after Rangers fans threw mugs on the ice during mug night.